Working on the future,today.

Every year for his birthday and Christmas I try to make an illustration for my babe. I really wanted to draw inklings because we both love Splatoon and I love the fact that the character skin is so customization friendly.

This past year has seen a great jump in representation. I don't know for sure if thats because I'm actively looking for it and making it in my art. I don't know if it's because more people are speaking up about it. I notice the biggest difference though when I go from online to in person.

Being with friends at events makes things much easier. I mentioned this in my Canzine review about how people who looked at the tables were not necessarily into comics. Some flat out said they did not like comics at all. At first I was mad because why would you go to a zinefest if you didn't like comics! Then I realized after asking why they didn't like comics it was because they think all comics are super hero based only. While I like super hero comics I've only made slice of life and magical comics. I have in total 2 super hero comics I'd want to make. 1 is steampunk, the other is like She-Hulk mixed with Iron Man. 

The other thing I was upset about was that 80% and more people selling and buying at the indie comics events I went to were white. Growing up where I did really effected how I live in the world outside of LA. Because I'm darker than "white passing" a lot of people treat me like they can't relate to me on any level. Thats weird to me because the part that I identify with most is being a nerd. I've been "complimented" that I am articulate as if English isn't my first language or get shit from people who refuse to believe that most of my family was in the US before it was even a country. Obviously many of my ancestors are Spanish,Portuguese and French. THANKS "settlers". 

So yes I have a lot of baggage about under-representation and being categorized. Knowing this of course I felt isolated at the zinfests. I really tried to hunt for the artists that looked like me. It was very exciting to find ones that were as talkative as me but also sad when I seen ones that were very shy and quiet. 

After I talked about what I was upset about with PB and my friend Drea I felt stronger. Even though I did feel scared to be a small voice at those events I want to keep going. If I'm not seeing people who look like me at events then why don't I be that person for others? So if you don't hear it enough from others,I'm gonna say it. DO THE THING. Make comics,go to events and be your own representation. I will find you and buy all your things! 

Canzine 2015: The pros and Cons

I had Press Start and a preview of Gardenia along with various prints. Canzine was way bigger than I thought and I was pretty intimidated standing in line with so many talented artists.

I was anxious the whole day even sitting with Cody at my side. I am working very hard to make sure this review is as postie and informative as possible. My anxiety weighed heavy on me for most of the day.


Pros:

There was so much room upstairs and down. Even with a 3 foot table I fit everything just fine. So many people had great displays,books and goodies at each table. There was one girl who bought Press Start outright because she liked games. It was the first sale I ever made for my own original art and it felt overwhelmingly satisfying.

We were able to get an extra chair for my hubs at no charge. I was the only one registered but I needed Cody as my table mate. He is the one who runs out for food or watches my table when I want to go meet friends.

This event was close to home! We live 1 hr transit away with pretty fast buses and trains. For that matter there are so many more indie conventions here than in LA. Thats not a surprise as LA is more of a mainstream kind of place.

Staff was very good about making announcements for workshops and other important info. The program was detailed,the goodie bags were rad and it was a nicely lit location.

Cons:

Even with first come first serve seating a table chart would have helped so much! The few conventions I've gone to before had them. I used them to promote the event and where I would be so that people could find me. I was told it was impossible to have a table chart with over 200 vendors. I wonder how SDCC,Anime Expo and so many others do it though? (More volunteers,yes I know....)

As a first time attendee I didn't know what time to be there to set up my table. No conformation email was sent to me so I asked on the facebook event, got no answer. Most of the time it's an hour before the event. I heard it was gong to be busy so I showed up at 10 AM, 3 hours before. To mild surprise there was already a line of maybe 20 people already.

Patrons are very standoffish and quiet. I may be shy in a friend setting but when I talk about my work I get excited. I love being friendly when someone shows interest in my work. I want to show my gratitude by interacting with people.

Some Observations:

Cody pointed out that no one seemed to care about comics. It pains me to agree but yes,most patrons just looked at prints or passed people by. I asked many of the people who stopped by my table if they liked games as Press Start is about gaming. Many said no and also that they're not really into comics either.

It looked like 80% of the vendors were white and I'm playing that down. It feels very weird to be one of very few brown people there. No one was mean to me because of this but it did make me feel like my voice in comics was burred in the sea. I'm friends with or admire from afar many cartoonists of color. So why aren't there more of us selling our comics at zinefests and cons?

These are the books I got and 1 sticker that was the last one. (I feel special). Cat Therapist by:Sarah Chan is the funniest take on cats taking care of you. Miss and the Monster by Lina Wu made me sad & intrigued to read more about Missy's adventures. Map Not To Scale and T(Ri)O by Rasiqra Revulva connected with me on my Toronto newbie life and on sexuality.

Overall zinefests are not like fancons and vice versa. From what I learned at Canzine it's more about making friends who make comics. I'll have to think about it before I apply for this event next year.

Treats All Around

PRESS START IS IN MY HANDS! 100 books from TLAC and I love how they came out. I learned so much about printing a book and laying it out after Gardenia 3 years ago.Like how bleed works,how to number your pages and why exactly CYMK is best for pro printers to have. Self printing a book is a LOT of work and I am glad I got the chance to make this investment in a pro company. Printing is still pretty expensive,even if you go to Staples and have a long arm stapler or print at home(ink cartridge replacements). Have no idea when I'll print my next book but this is more of a once a year thing. This was also a small print run. I've heard podcast people and others say they get 1,000 books! Thats the dream,yo!

Speaking of prints I made some new ones for Canzine & Toronto Queerzine. 

These are cleaned up art for some tattoo ideas I did inspired by my Gran and Moms zodiac signs and favorite creatures. I added the sugar skulls to include my interest of the after life. I used reference from a book I have about how to love a lady published in the 1800's I found at Goodwill. So basically a lot of my heart is in these drawings. They will be made black and white soon so I can get them tattooed on each of my shoulders. 

The Invisible is yet another drawing I've redone at least 3 times now since 2009. The first chunk of my life I spent feeling like a ghost. I wasn't good at speaking because I was very shy and I still suffer from it. When the society you grow up in is fixed on Social Darwinism it's no wonder I still have issues with "fitting in". Thanks to the wiki for the symbolism of the blue rose I now know that it's a symbol of attaining the impossible. In my case it was being able to work on my social anxiety. The Siamese cat was kept in for my partner. It's his favorite cat pattern. 

Toronto Comic Jam did an interview and feature with me. I feel very homered that I got to be featured along with 5 pages of Gardenia in there too. I try to go out to the monthly event but the SA and getting bogged down in work kinda hinders that. 

I did do some panels while I went this last month.

Finally here is a WIP preview of the cover for Gardenia. Need to add the title and other versions of Rae's look but here it is. 

Autumn instead of Fall

New side of the world,new terms. I'm learning all kinds of things and planning to learn Spanish and French soon. Speaking of progress here are my babies for Ashes and Coffee Stains from 2009-2015. It took a little over a month to finish these 4 as I made full character sheet for them in color,including 5 face expressions. Theres a first for everything and this is the year of kicking stuff off.

See the full sheets at www.patreon.com/kittiecakes

While cleaning out my hard drive I fount this drawing of Hikari I did and redid over the years. I thought I'd draw her one more time. Who knows how many more times I will in my life.It's fun to see the progress in retrospect when all we get to see while in the present is being stuck sometimes. 

This is the 3rd installment of monthly sketchbooks! I don't know why I got out of practice in the first place besides being stressed. This on the other hand relieves my stress,helps me work faster,solve drawing issues and practice. I always knew drawing a lot makes you improve and I cannot recommend this enough. Wither you share it or not it should be something we all do everyday/moment we can. It's YOUR sketchbook,draw what you want in any medium you want! Don't be precious about it and draw on any kind of paper. I draw my sketchbook on printer paper. If I get mad I just through the page out. I've learned to just draw over it though or use the other side. 

If what stops you is what people will think of what you're drawing just push that outa your mind. I don't post it yet but I have a separate sketchbook for sexy stuff. Of course some people will have bad things to say about that but it's MY sketchbook after all. 

On September 12 is our first wedding anniversary and we started dating September 16. According to PB though we don't also celebrate our dating anniversary. I WANT DOUBLE PRESENTS,payable in cuddles and kisses. It's also my grans birthday. We agreed on this date as a way to remember her. After the first time she met Cody she told me "You found a cute one this time!"so that just furthered the idea I knew he was the one. 

30th Birthday

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

I sketched this last year but didn't have time to clean up til recently. Photoshop has always been my go to until I bought Manga Studio 5. The pen tool worked even better than micon pens and so much better than photoshop brushes. Different tools for different things of course. PS is for painting and MS5 is for well...manga and crisp lines. I could use illustrator but I just never really liked how it works. Behind FP is says Om. Thats the extent of that language I know. I did research for this heavily so I hope it's pretty accurate. 

So August 17 I will be 30 years on this earth,hooray. This whole post is going to be about some positive things because this is an important milestone for me. I've gone to a lot of therapy in the past 2 years,gotten medication to help and moved cross country. I've finished a short story about a zombie and the woman who loved her,I'm working on my second book along with a weekly comic that I actually keep up with! When I first started making comics online I only posted 3 pages of every story I tried to start,ever. I also had school 40 hours a week and a job. 

This is basically the finished cover for Press Start. It should be done by September 1. 

I sent a pitch into Elements Anthology and currently waiting for some kind of email saying I got in. I have to cross my fingers,heh. It's the first pitch I've officially made. It's about a female shounen hero who's also kind of a magical girl. Her name is Citlamina,she has a cute girlfriend & is always trying to protect people. 

Mina is a buffbitch who will kick your butt

I'm very excited about starting Ashes and Coffee Stains next year. Been making character sheet for the first 4 main characters so far. They're on my patreon in full form with facial expressions and body poses. 

 The best thing thats happened this year is I've been making friends fast! It's always been excruciatingly hard to make friends but since I have medicine now,some therapy exercises instilled and I'm out of LA it's way easier to talk to people. Sorry LA lovers,ya can keep it! Everything here is so much easier to get too and also it's not hot as a desert. I went to my second Toons On Tap where it was a Wonder Woman theme. Had lots of fun too while talking to people.

In the Feels: Why I make fanart for free (mostly)

I love a lot of series so yes I make fanart from time to time. More likely than not though I'm usually making original characters inspired by what I like. By that I mean I start to analyze the designs of the shows or the story structures and learn to do it myself. Shows I like spark my researcher instincts! I also do fanart to exercise my skills at mimicking styles. There is a struggle in me about making original art in my own style and doing fanart to mimic so I might get hired at said show or by someone who wants that specific style. 

So why sell fanart then? For one I'm trying to sell out of the prints I made before I got out of making fanart so much. When I started making fan work for sale I didn't think I would ever be good enough to make my own characters and worlds. Drawings I could always polish but my ideas I never felt were going to get me a job. When I was in high school I made all kinds of original things but it was hammered home that I was apparently a "dime a dozen" and to just try to get into a studio to work for.

Whats the difference of making fan art and working for a studio,right? Getting paid for it officially I guess? Some fan artists draw even better than the shows they come from! For years I've been annoyed off and on about selling it at all. I've been yelled at not to do it and for getting mad myself at others selling it themselves.

I did this sketch because I wanted to practice run cycles. Maybe I'll clean this up for a print along with the Steven U FLCL crossover I've been working on. There are many reasons why I sell fanart and none of them are about using it as a career in only making fanart.

When I sell at fan conventions it helps bring people to my table AND I like making fan art. I make small runs of the prints,literally 2-3 copies of each print.  I went to a fan con last weekend just to sell off the rest of my fan art prints. I did end up making 2 more but I can save them for other fan cons I made go to before I can fully get into indie cons.

Now I still like making my fan doodles but only on my terms. I will take requests for money but when I draw something to show my love for a series I'm going to show it the way I feel. I've had a few people get mad because after they asked me to draw some fandom thing I sent them my commission rates.

Everyone should make what they want. My hubs asked what would I do if people sold fan art of my work. Of course I'd be upset but I'd also be flattered. The thing that makes it not ok is when my art,fan art or original,gets taken outright where the thief takes my signature off while adding their own. If someone takes the time to draw their own version of my character to show me love and sells it then it's complicated. As long as they are directing people to the original creator,me,then ok I guess? Isn't that the idea of fan art anyway, getting people to like what you like/connecting with your fandom?

When I stopped making fan art I did notice a drop in popularity of course. Now I want to focus on my original content. What is more important to me now is making my own stories. I want to create characters that I love like children and I do. I don't have a lot of likes or comments like I did on my fan art but I get better comments that say more than "cute" or  "make so and so in your style". I've made real friends who talk to me about making comics. In the end thats what I want to have in the long run.

Atomic Lollipop 2015: The show!

My first con in Toronto,yay! I was holding off doing conventions til next year but I really wanted to make new friends and get to know the scene here. Ever since we got here I've been going to events and not having much luck making connections. Even normal people would have a hard time of it after moving to a whole new place where the only one you know is your spouse. I don't know how I ever made friends in the first place but thanks for liking me enough to keep talking. 

Usually I get more time to prep for a con but I got the acceptance notice for this 2 weeks before the event! I don't know what happened but I worked my ass off for the 2 weeks making comic pages and making some new prints. 

I had this Stevonnie sketch in my book so I cleaned that up. I also made my make it rain tiger bucks into a print.Surprisingly I sold out of my Marci/PB and Jake/Lady prints. Not so surprising was I sold most of my grilled cheese hot tub & breakfast threesome prints. I love food puns so had some weird burst of confidence about them.  

This is my new table poster/banner. I seen most people only have 1 image but I really like a lot of my pieces and wanted to be different as well. When I get a little more money I want to make it into one of those big banners. 

Next up is all (beside 1 I forgot take a pic of) of the commissions I did this weekend. I had a "Custom Inkling" sign up and I will admit that caught more eyes than my regular sketch commission page. 

 Overall the con was fun. I shared a table with Scott Uminga and his nice boyfriend Kevin. They drew in my sketchbook and I in theirs. One bad thing about the con was that there wasn't a seating chart UNTIL we got there. As far as I knew anyway. If there was one I could have been promoting it for the entire time! Next time I get a table at Atomic Lollipop I'll do it months in advance for sure!